Tanzanian forum: Jokes - Musician Jokes
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23 Apr 2015 15:46

When Mozart passed away, he was buried in a churchyard.
A couple
days later, the town drunkard was walking through the
cemetery and heard
some strange noises coming from the area where Mozart
was buried.
Terrified, the drunkard ran and got the priest to come and
listen to it.
The priest bent close to the grave and heard some faint,
unrecognizable music coming from the grave. Frightened,
the priest ran and got the town magistrate.
When the magistrate arrived, he bent his ear to the grave,
listened for a moment, and said, "Ah, yes, that's Mozart's
Ninth Symphony,
being played backwards."
He listened a while longer, and said, "There's the Eighth
Symphony,
And it's backwards, too. Most puzzling."
So the magistrate kept listening; "There's the Seventh... the
Sixth...the Fifth..." Suddenly the realization of what was
happening dawned
on the magistrate; he stood up and announced to the
crowd that had gathered in the
cemetery. "My fellow citizens, there's nothing to worry
about. It's just Mozart decomposing."

23 Apr 2015 15:47

A musical director was having a lot of trouble with one
drummer. He talked and talked and talked with the
drummer, but his performance simply didn't improve.
Finally, before the whole orchestra, he said, "When a
musician just can't handle his instrument and doesn't
improve when given help, they take away the instrument,
and give him two sticks, and make him a drummer."
A stage whisper was heard from the percussion section:
"And if he can't handle even that, they take away one of his
sticks and make him a conductor.

23 Apr 2015 15:50

A down and out musician was playing his harmonica in the
middle of a busy shopping mall. Striding over, a policeman
asked, “May I please see your permit?” I don’t have one,”
confessed the musician. “In that case, you’ll have to
accompany me.”
“Splendid!” exclaimed the musician. “What shall we sing?”

23 Apr 2015 15:52

A stage mother cornered the concert violinist in his dressing
room and insisted he listen to a tape of her talented son
playing the violin. The man agreed to listen, and the woman
switched on the tape player. “What music’” the violinist
thought. A difficult piece, but played with such genius that it
brought tears to his eyes. He listened spellbound to the
entire recording. “Madam,” he whispered is that your son?”
“No, she replied. “That’s Jascha Heifetz. But my son sounds
just like him.