Nigerian forum: Family & kids - WIVES ARE PRECIOUS GIFT
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2 Dec 2015 11:16

YOU CAN'T FORCE A WOMAN TO BE A FULL HOUSEWIFE
I have always believed that women do the hardest job in the world; making a house a home and educating/raising children. Such is the enormity and complexity of this that ideally, it should not be mixed with other distractions. Think of how much a handful you were growing up then add the troubles of your siblings to it, wrap that in your dad's ego driven requests and put the package at the feet of a woman, still you got raised this good. Like I always say, every dedicated mother is a superwoman. (every man doing it is also super).
When I was dreaming about a family, I pictured a self established wife, free to call her own shots and have all the time to navigate this role without distractions, until......life happened.
As much as I wanted this, I found that it made little sense to have her ability to contribute to the family income pool go to waste. All those years chasing degrees and the natural entrepreneurial skills needed to count for something. Common sense made me go from the guy who insisted on a full house wife to one who allowed concessions and tweaks that optimised the system.
The reality now is that when I go broke, I have a reliable backup somewhere because team work works.
This is my situation as it works for me. For others, maybe not the same as the conditions will be different but the key thing here is understanding the important things in the home.
It is also important to know and understand what each party wants balanced with what the home needs. Sometimes one needs to peg a career as a professional to grow a career as a home maker. I know for sure that both can be balanced but while we are it, juggling, we should not let the home suffer.
Good men want their wives to grow, they help their wives grow but the best men are more about the home as a whole.
As complex as this whole episode sounds, a simple discussion where the unified and combined interest of the home is put first usually resolves it. If it doesn't , it simply means the talks need to continue.
Peace

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3 Dec 2015 18:04

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3 Dec 2015 22:02

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3 Dec 2015 22:56

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4 Dec 2015 11:26

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4 Dec 2015 11:29

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